New Responsibility

What do the kids want most of all this summer? Freedom.

Freedom to make their own meals, freedom to choose their own clothes (though the act of getting them ON is something they'd still like help with), and freedom to wander the neighborhood without Mom or Dad tagging along.

Requests 1 and 2 are easy to grant.... request 3 is going to be hard for me. The kids can go around the block currently with a friend, with each other, or with the dog. Jacob this afternoon asked if he could go alone. I said OK. A few minutes later the neighbor across the street came over to ask if I knew he was in the street on Meadow Grove (the busier street that parallels ours). I said he was exploring the block.

But it was nice to know that the neighbors look out for the kids too. I see pretty soon it's going to be "can I go to the park?" or "can I take the long walk." Ack..... we're so happy to see them start walking when they are 1. Little do we know this is what it leads to - around the block, to the park, with their friends, in a car...... can I skip this part???

Perhaps I'll create a new mantra "I will not be a helicopter parent, I will not be a helicopter parent."

Soccer Pic

Jacob and his friend Kaden playing soccer the other week. I don't know what's with the pose....

not ideal

Not quite the sight I want in my face first thing in the morning....

The proprietery playdate

One side effect of the growth of playdates is the notion that they are some type of sacred contract between the invited and invitee. I seem to remember a much more organic style of playing when I was young. I would call Megan Stevens and we'd say something like "wanna play?" and then one of the other of us would be running through the backyards to get together. I also remember playing with multiple kids at a time (the three-is-a-crowd lesson learned over and over again). Maybe I have a rosy remembrance of the past.

The kids had a half-day today and the neighbor boy, who is in Jacob's class, had a playdate with another boy who is also in Jacob's class. I tried to keep Jacob entertained and we called several other friends because Jacob was pretty desperate to play with someone. No luck - many people were taking the long weekend to head out of town.

So after a few hours, Jacob ended up standing on the edge of the lawn staring over at the other two boys playing. I suggested that he simply go over and ask if he could play too. The more, the merrier, right? After a little back and forth between the boys, Jacob was invited to join them. Less than 5 minutes later, Jacob had been sent home by the neighbor dad.

I can kindof see two sides of the issue - one, Jacob and the neighbor get to play together often and played most of the afternoon last Friday until the neighbor was sent to his room for being mean to Jacob (a dynamic that is probably worthy of it's own post). The classmate wasn't invited over to play with the neighbor AND Jacob - also the playdate might have been a conscious effort to have the neighbor play with someone specifically other than Jacob.

But the other hand is that after he's been invited to join by the two boys - it seemed rude for the neighbor dad to then promptly send him home. It couldn't have been that the playdate classmate was excluded from play - there wasn't enough time for that.

I've decided that the neighbor dad just doesn't like his kids playing with our kids. I've talked to enough parents with similar stories to know this isn't a unique situation. I'm sure there were kids I played with that my parents didn't care for. I don't ever remember my parents sending anyone home. "I'm sorry Lori..... Jamie and Nancy are playing right now."

Jacob is now happily playing with his friend Dominic. No lingering problems other Mom trying to keep her opinions to herself.

Brutal

Jacob's soccer team lost their game last night in what can easily be called a crushing defeat. We lost count, but the score was something like 20-4. I throw out the old cliches of "you win some, you lose some" and "playing a good team makes you play better." The kids were not really buying it.

It seems that at this age, the winning team is decided largely on who has the better single player. Our team doesn't have one of those players and the team they played against had 3. Also, Jacob's team is very young - it's supposed to be 5K. Jacob's team are almost all late spring / summer birthdays. And they have two kids who are not even 5 yet but are playing in the league as exceptions. This makes them the youngest team, and in some cases almost 2 years younger than the opposing team.

I know there aren't good solutions there will always be winners and losers, and really the kids are out there to have fun (it's why we chose the league and not the other in town). But you also want the kids to have fun, and kids equate "fun" with "winning." So, the other team had lots of fun. I'm guessing they have fun every week.

Holy Productivity Batman!

E-waste to recycling center -
Library books returned -
Checks deposited at bank -
Park Pavilion reservation paid -
Lab supplies ordered -
Plane tickets refunded -
Daycamp deposit dropped off -

Productive 2 hours!

Jacob's birthday

Well, it officially must be nice weather on June 5th, since we're having Jacob's birthday party at the park. He wants a sports themed party, specifically kickball. This might be more work than last year's YMCA bouncy birthday party, but that's OK. It's still not at our house.

(the rain plan is to go bowling)

If anyone falls into the central venn diagram category of people who (a) read this blog and (b) are inclined to purchase Jacob a birthday present: here are a few ideas. Super Mario Party for Wii; Star Wars Character Encyclopedia book; any type of playground ball; and outdoor games like croquet or horseshoes.