Not a happily drugged girl

Allison had a cavity (actually two, with a few smaller "areas of interest.")  They are all in baby teeth, but at the rate she's losing baby teeth, the dentist figured she'd have these until she was about 14.  We're actually still waiting for the 6-yr molars to appear.

So, we decided to fill the cavities.  This required a numbing, which required a needle, which required sedation.  So, we picked up a tablet of valium at Walgreen's yesterday and gave it to her at 7am this morning. 

Since her appointment was at 8am, I dropped Jacob off at Allison's friend Melanie's house (right by the dentist) so that he could ride to school with her.  Apparently the joy of a day off of school vegging on the couch watching TV was not sufficient to balance the injustice of having your brother get to hang out with your friend for 10 minutes before school. 

Allison was in the backseat just wailing about how much she misses Melanie and why can't SHE go to Melanie's before school.

"It's not FAIR MOM!"
"She's MY friend!"
"I want to see Melanie!"
"I would call her but I don't even know her PHONE NUMBER!!  I only know MY phone number!!  AHHHHHHHHH!"

She was still wailing when we arrived at the dentist's office, much to the chagrin of the other parents in the waiting area.  Upset about the dentist.... nah.  Upset that little brother gets to ride with friend to school while she spends the WHOLE DAY at home. 

Of Course It Would!!

So Allison goes to school today with her new short haircut.

Of course a letter comes home informing us that someone in her class had head lice.

(Allison does not have head lice - I don't know if it was someone else or what)

Ok, winds of fate, I'm not laughing anymore!

Also, why does the headlice letter make your head itch?

Beauty School Dropout

Never good to get a fearful/tearful phone call from your babysitter.

Probably worse to start laughing when she tells you that your daughter somehow had scissors in her bedroom and decided to give herself a haircut when said babysitter thought she was sleeping.

I should have known the night was going to be weird.  It was the end of a weird week, we were out with friends watching a band full of people that we knew, and then there were two of Allison's classmates at the bar.  Yeah, you read it right - 3rd graders at a bar on Friday night.  Gotta love Wisconsin!  I think this also speaks clearly to the status of our social life.

So we returned home (eventually - I mean, why rush, what's done is done and now we clearly need a drink!).  I made Brian promise that he wouldn't get her up to look until I got back from taking the babysitter home - as I thought it would be harmful to the esteem of the sitter if we rushed in an immediately ran upstairs to take a look-see.  I do really like our sitter, and I don't believe that it was her fault anyway - unless she'd supplied the scissors and said "hey, you'd look cut with a mullet."

And a mullet is what it was.  There were three lengths that aren't conveyed clearly in this picture (the 2-inch bangs, the 4 inch sides, and then 12 inch back that was clearly unreachable with last-year's snub-nosed 5-inch school fiskars).  I can say that it was worst than I hoped, but better than I feared.  I did a midnight google search of pixie haircuts to convince myself that it would be OK and in the morning did another search for a reputable haircut salon that was open on Sunday (this was not a job for Cost Cutters).  We ended up at JC Penney (a small step up, but a step up none-the-less).

This is what we managed.  It makes me a little ill when I consider that we spent 2 years growing out the bangs, and her hair was finally braid and ponytail-able.  She (of course) is happy as a clam with her new short 'do, and was slightly offended that I took a side trip to Claire's post-cut to purchase some big bows and headbands to hide what the stylist couldn't ("I can't really fix this big chunk here without taking off another 2 inches all around").  I even contemplated getting her ears pierced so that people would know that she's a girl, but then my rational mind figured that Brian would have to be present for that endeavor because I would clearly be laid out on the floor and that's no good for anyone.

So the new mantra: hair grows, and it could be worse.  (and if I repeat this several times, perhaps I will start to believe it too.....)

As the saying goes

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.....

People these days

I don't know about you all - but a frequent topic of conversation at the faculty lunch table is the eroding lack or etiquette - particularly among students - particularly in their e-mails.  I love the ones that come in something like this:

jamie,
i m not going to be in class. r we doing anything important?
(rarely a name included here)


But today I was also the recipient of an e-mail intended for Jacob's soccer coach.  It was as follows:

"Can we get some work on when and how to get the pictures from Saturday?  I felt it was very unorganized for the parents and even the kids.

Thank you."

The Thank You seems a little insincere if you ask me.  No "Dear Coach" and no name signed (and no rereading of the e-mail).  I went ahead and responded (noting that they probably didn't mean to send it to me) but gave them the (previously distributed) info on the photographer's website and noticed that the pictures were not posted yet.  No big shock since the pictures were only on Saturday.

Sometimes I think we forget that there are actual people on the receiving ends of these e-mails.

Quitting

I think Allison quit choir tonight.  Since piano had gone so well this past year (Allison has stuck with something for a year!), I had thought that the non-audition girl choir would be a good fit - and it was - for two weeks.  Then she didn't want to go, and last week went very badly.  And then she didn't want to go again and Mom caved. 

Here's the dilemma - I feel that we need to instill in the kids that when they agree to something they need to follow through.  And we'd probably never let Jacob quit something midway through - double standard alert!  But Allison has the power to make everyone miserable if she's forced into something against her will.  Incentives (bribes), consequences (threats), and guilt (guilt) have no affect on her.  And it becomes not just her and me - but her and me and the choir director and all the other girls in choir.  Is it fair to them?

I'm sure there are opinions aplenty about the choices that we (as parents) make and the battles we choose to fight or not.  I recall a recent conversation with another mother about having her kids make the beds and my thought was "well, there's your problem - skip the whole 'making the bed' thing."  We simply don't make the beds because that's a battle with a very high cost to benefit ratio.  I'm sure to many people it's unheard of to not have kids make the beds (or have beds made in general).

The thing with Allison is that most issues have a very high cost to benefit ratio - therefore you have to save your energy for those things that matter more.  It's MORE important to me that she stick with piano than argue about every afterschool activity because she doesn't want to go to choir.  It's MORE important that we get out the door in the morning without tears (mostly) than that the kids make their beds. 

Also, I'm secretly a little tired of running around.  Choir, brownies, piano, soccer practice, soccer games, cub scouts, therapy.  It's possible I saw a small glimmer of freedom appear on Monday afternoons (soon to be the only day without an after-school activity).  I guess if she doesn't want to do it - I'm not going to force this issue.

Jacob Says

Jacob quotes:

Math is just slapping numbers around.

The solar system is like when all the planet gather around the sun because the sun is going to tell them a story.